( MYSTERIOUS MUSIC )
(Radio announcer speaks Russian)
(American accent) Hi. Julie Schofield.
Hello.
That thing does work properly, does it?
Oh, it works just fine.
I want my words preserved for posterity.
I won't miss a thing.
Drink? Thanks very much.
No bourbon, I'm afraid. Scotch.
Scotch would be great.
Ice? Mm-hm.
Yes, of course.
I'm afraid so.
I've always wanted fame.
I've always liked the idea of my name going down in history.
Going down as a spy for Russia?
Fame or infamy -- what does it matter?
I shan't be forgotten.
If my mother could only see me now.
The last of the few.
It really was only a few?
Oh, there were plenty of people waiting to see which way to jump.
Things only had to go a little differently and...well, you know.
But, yes, in practice we were just a few.
A happy few.
"A band of brothers."
Shakespeare. 'Henry V'.
Our most patriotic king.
How big a band were you, this band of brothers?
Some things have to remain secret, even now.
You sure?
Certain, no less.
Background, dear lady, is all I can give you.
The whole delightful, utterly despicable English background.
Well, I understand the delightfulness, alright,
but not why you had to despise it.
How someone of your class and, well, background...
Should want to kick it in the teeth? Precisely.
You have no idea what life in England in the 1930s was like.
Treason and loyalty, they're all relative, you know.
Treason to what?
Loyalty to whom?
That's what matters.
(Choir sings).. I vow to thee, my country
.. All earthly things above
.. Entire and whole and perfect
.. The service of my love
.. The love that asks no question
.. The love that stands the test
.. That lays upon the altar
.. The dearest and the best
.. The land that never falters
.. The love that pays the price
.. The love that makes undaunted
.. The final sacrifice
.. And there's another country
.. I've heard of long ago
.. Most dear to them that love her
.. Most great to them that know.....
( GLASS SHATTERS )
.. We may not count her armies
.. We may not see her king
.. Her fortress is a faithful heart.....
( SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC )
.. Her pride is suffering.....
( CREAKING )
.. And soul by soul and silently
.. Her shining bounds increase
.. And her ways are ways of gentleness.....
Martineau! Robbins!
.. And all her paths are peace...
They shall grow not old as we that are left grow old.
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun,
and in the morning,
we will remember them.
ALL: We will remember them.
BOY: Want to come and have lunch? My parents are down.
That's very nice of you. Thanks.
You were laughing. I was not.
Giggling, then. I didn't utter a sound.
You were giggling silently. I couldn't concentrate at all.
Even a crusty old Tory like you, Devenish,
must see it's absolutely ludicrous
for 400 boys to line up and blub for people they never knew.
What do you mean, didn't know?
Who died in a businessman's war
because they were too stupid to shoot their superior officers
and start a revolution like the Russians.
They were the superior officers, weren't they?
We could all see who YOU were thinking about.
Wharton! Wharton!
A glass of sherry?
Yes, Barclay? Take these round to all the Houses.
I want one on every noticeboard before lunch.
Yes, Barclay.
What you forget is all those people died for us.
They died for their class. You are their class.
It's silly to pretend you're not.
You're always trying to be different.
What's wrong with being different? There you are.
I mean, you want to be elected to be a God, don't you, Devenish?
Yes. They're different.
That's not what I mean.
(Sighs) You wait.
My waistcoats are going to be the most different you've ever seen.
Why an intelligent person like you
should want to be part of a self-perpetuating oligarchy...
It's a pity you have to be a prefect before you can be elected,
else I'd be wearing one now.
You'll make it. Menzies will see to that. Will I? That's the question.
I expect so.
Would you like to do the honours? Yes, of course.
Well, I must say I think that's the best service yet.
Yes.
( GENERAL CHATTER )
(Boys shout raucously)
Boys! Have any of you seen Martineau?
( MELANCHOLY MUSIC )
( BELL CHIMES )
Bennett, do pull yourself together.
It's not even as though he was there.
Not yet.
Any moment now, the great oak doors of Longford
will swing open on their rusty hinges...
That door does need oiling.
..and the glorious vision will step forth.
He'll stand a moment, winsomely framed in the tumescent archway.
Doing what?
Sniffing the wind.
Like a dappled deer.
(Laughs) Oh, my God.
And then...then he'll shoot a tender yet burning,
soft yet passionate glance
across the 300 yards of sacred turf,
hoping against hope that I shall be there to receive it.
Hmm.
And I shall lay my heart at his feet.
Must have enormous feet if they'll stretch from Longford's to here.
They are. Want a peek? Thank you, no.
You seen Martineau?
No, I only have eyes for one person in the entire world.
Any of you? Probably with his parents.
I don't think that they came down.
Still, never mind. Thanks.
No, thank you for the good-humoured restraint
with which you exercise your power.
It's not only not fair, it's not even sensible.
Come on, Judd.
Our parents spend hundreds of pounds sending us here to be educated
and we spend the entire time playing games.
Quite right too. Games are good for Bolsheviks.
Teach you a bit of team spirit.
You could be good at cricket if you'd try.
I don't want to try. I want to be left alone to do my work.
I hope you're not taking those bio notes out of House, Bennett.
Then you hope in vain, Fowler.
Farcical's given me permission to use them for nature study.
Who? Farcical.
If you mean the Housemaster, kindly use his proper name.
You didn't. What?
Use his proper name.
His proper name is Mr Farquharson.
Are you trying to be clever? I don't have to try. I am clever.
I've half a mind to ask for permission to beat you.
You've half a mind, we agree on that.
(Boys laugh) (Yells) Quiet!
Get changed, everybody.
Anyone late for the House matches
will be up before Barclay for six strokes.
ALL: Ooh!
What you have to grasp, Devenish,
is that Fowler is precisely what this school was designed to produce.
Not empire builders. Dear me, no. Building empires needs imagination.
Empire ruling. Oh, do dry up.
Fowler will go straight from the King's African Rifles
into the Colonial Service.
He'll end up with an OBE. And syphilis.
Bennett, do you mind?
He'll catch it off a little native girl
who he'll visit after dark in her steamy primeval hut.
When he gets back to his mildewed wife in Bexhill-on-Sea,
he won't be able to look at her so he'll turn her over...
For heaven's sake!
Serves her right for marrying an imperialist and an exploiter.
There's nothing wrong with the Colonial Service...
"It's a perfectly decent career." Shut up!
There is nothing decent about colonialism.
I don't see why you have to be against everything.
I'm not. I'm FOR revolution.
Alright, everyone!
Umpires for Longfords versus Chancellors?
Me, please. Me and Judd.
Alright.
I don't want to go and umpire. Yes, you do. Come along.
( SCATTERED APPLAUSE )
( WISTFUL MUSIC )
BOY: Umpire!
Umpire, that was a wide.
No, it wasn't.
I couldn't possibly have reached that.
Course you could. You just didn't try.
It was practically outside the white line.
Are you arguing with the umpire?
Because arguing with the umpire is not school practice.
It might be in your House but it isn't in ours.
Since we beat you last week, you can shut up.
Play!
Howzat?!
Out!
( SCATTERED APPLAUSE )
BOY: We should have rung the muffled peal after the dedication.
I don't see why we didn't. Because we're not good enough.
You don't have to be good to run a muffled peal. It's muffled.
No-one can really tell.
I'll muffle you if you don't shut up.
Out! You lot -- go! Out, all of you.
Spungin, you get a master. Now!
Jesus, God! Did you see? That was Martineau.
(Slams door)
This place.
(Angrily) This place!
These things should be left to the Gods.
He'd never have done it if he hadn't been sent to see the headmaster.
He knew that meant expulsion.
Yes, but once a master caught him, Delahay, it was out of our hands.
Especially as it was with a man from another House.
The Gods could have dealt with it. That's what we're here for.
Prefects handle House matters.
The Gods deal with everything else.
And masters should mind their own business.
Even the mighty Gods can't expel people, Delahay.
Who needs people expelled?
You wouldn't have let Martineau stay? Of course.
But he wouldn't have sat down for a week
after the Gods finished with him.
If we expel everyone who indulges... There we are, aren't we?
The tone of this whole House has gone to pieces
and you, Delahay, are mainly responsible.
Fowler, please. Yes. Shut up, Fowler.
But it's precisely attitudes like that...
Will you shut up?!
Now, we're all, I know, very distressed about what's happened.
Personally...well, I've always tried to make everyone feel
he can come to me at any time,
whatever the problem.
But he must have been desperate.
It probably wouldn't have made any difference.
But if he'd talked to me, to you... Anyone!
However, we have to try and overcome our personal feelings.
And remember our responsibility to the House.
We don't want people rushing off confessing things,
which, quite frankly, they'd do better to keep to themselves.
If people have things to confess, they should confess them.
A thorough clear-out is what this House needs.
I'd like there to BE a House next term for me to be Head of.
I'm sure it's not nearly on that scale.
Anyway, wouldn't you like to start with a clean House?
Quite frankly, I doubt if such a thing as a clean House exists,
in this school or any other.
What about a special session of House prayers?
BOY: Almighty and most merciful Father.
ALL: "Almighty and most merciful Father,
"we have erred and strayed from thy ways like lost sheep.
"We have followed too much
"the devices and desires of our own hearts."
If you ask me, it all comes of having masters who aren't old boys.
I see.
Well, an old boy would have more sense
than to go prowling around gymnasium changing room.
Everybody knows what goes on there.
Look, you'd better watch yourself, Bennett.
Discretion is going to be the better part of valour around here.
Wouldn't you say?
May I go and talk to Judd, please?
If you think you can get a word in.
"Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind.
"It is abomination.
"Neither shalt thy lie with any beast to defile thyself therewith.
"Neither shall any woman stand before a beast to lie down there too.
"lt is confusion. Defile not ye yourselves in any of these things."
Alone at last! Get off.
I'll get you one day. No, you won't.
Yes, I will. Everyone gives in in the end. It's Bennett's Law.
I won't give in. Then you're not normal.
My God, that was quick. Who did it? Matron.
Poor Martineau.
The reason everyone gives in in the end
is they get lonely doing it on their own.
They long for company. Well, I don't.
Not your sort, anyway.
That's why my mother's marrying this awful Colonel person.
Arthur.
It couldn't just possibly be that she loves him?
Out of the question.
He's got one of those awful little moustaches. He's ghastly.
Almost as much of a loather as my father was.
You mean even you would draw the line?
Don't be revolting.
He's a grown-up.
Of course. And it's all just a passing phase.
Exactly. Just like you being a communist.
Ha, ha.
Judd... Hmm?
You and your usherette. What about her?
Is is really so different?
From what?
Boys.
How would I know? I've only ever had a girl.
What is it, Wharton?
I don't know what to do about Spungin's water.
Leave him to pass it on his own. Pour it out.
He makes a terrible fuss if his water's cold.
He said he'd report me to Barclay.
Go and fill up the jug with new hot water, bring it back,
cover it with a flannel and leave it by Spungin's bed.
Thanks, Judd.
( TAP RUNS )
Hurry up, Wharton. Yes, Delahay.
God, 'Das Kapital' looks difficult.
I haven't found anything I couldn't understand eventually.
And if they taught us any economics here
instead of Tudors and bloody Stuarts...
Marx should be a set book for the 6ths.
They shouldn't leave us to fight our way through it on our own.
And under the blankets.
Barclay confiscated another torch last night.
How many's that? 12.
12 torches taken away
to stop me getting the education I'm supposed to be here for.
God, if our parents only knew what actually went on here.
They do know.
The fathers, anyway.
( SOLEMN MUSIC )
Bennett, what the hell are you doing? Go to bed.
( BOYS SING )
(All sing).. My kingdom says
.. I'm yours forever
.. Dear Lord, thy creatures all
.. I swear.....
( BELLS TOLL )
( INTRIGUING MUSIC )
What's this?
I'm very sorry, Fowler, I thought I...
Juniors aren't required to think, Wharton.
They're required to obey orders and I told you to make this shine.
Yes, Fowler.
Well...
..not bad except for that smear.
Get it off.
Yes, Fowler.
BENNETT: If you're going to be in the south of France,
you might look around for a little villa for August.
Might I?
Why not just extend the honeymoon?
I could pop down on the Blue Train just as soon as school's over.
I see.
I only want to bring one friend. It won't be at all expensive.
I don't think Arthur would like Judd, darling.
I don't mean Judd, darling.
Anyway, Arthur thinks everyone under the age of 18
is either a pinko or a pansy,
so it won't make much difference who I bring, will it?
You know, I'm awfully worried.
You see, it is an established fact
that people who go around suspecting vice in others
are highly suspect themselves.
But Arthur's the most normal man I've ever known!
What better disguise? Listen, there's still time to call it off.
Come on, let's stop the car.
You really shouldn't joke about it, Guy.
Not after that poor boy.
I suppose he was dreadfully unpopular.
Martineau? No.
I should've thought a boy like that...
Better off dead, no doubt about it.
Well, I have known one or two of, er... of those.
And they're never very happy, you know.
Mummy!
Oh, they can be very amusing, but, er... Oh, here we are!
( ORGAN MUSIC PLAYS IN DISTANCE )
( GENERAL CHATTER )
If you ask me, public schools go on too long.
(Laughs) Arthur means the fees. It's not just the fees.
Look at Guy. He's not a boy anymore. He's a young man.
Aren't you, old chap? Rather.
You should leave at the end of this term. Take a job for a bit.
Go round the world. You must be mad.
School's just getting to the good bit.
You need to find out a bit about life before you go up to the varsity.
I second that. Why not the army?
Why not, indeed? First class.
I mean, one learns so much about life in the army.
Yes. Killing people.
Excuse me.
Mummy!
How dare you talk like that?!
How dare you plan to send me around the world
without even consulting me?
It's alright, Ivy. Oh, excuse me.
It was only an idea, darling. It's just that Arthur thought...
(Whispers) Arthur! We only want what's best for you.
If either of you seriously thinks I would leave now,
after 10 years of hard labour
in the salt mines of prep and public school...
You want to stay? I'll be a God, Mummy.
What?
The school elite. The creme de la creme.
Oh, yes. Of course.
It's the only thing that's made the last 10 years endurable --
thinking one day I'd be top of the whole stinking heap!
Well, if that's how you feel, darling.
I really must get back to my wedding.
( HORN BLARES )
( CHOPIN'S 'RAINDROP' PRELUDE )
Would you care for a drink, sir?
Ah, yes. A glass of sherry, thank you.
Very good, sir.
Gosh, you are brave.
Did you think I wouldn't come?
I, um, didn't know. I hoped you would.
Well...
..here I am.
I, um, hope you're hungry. I'm ravenous.
I've had nothing to eat but a bit of caviar and toast all day long.
Doesn't sound bad.
Oh! It's awful.
Listen, I, um...
..I can't call you Harcourt.
My name's Guy. I know.
I found out.
Mine's James. James.
That's a very nice name.
I nearly lost my nerve. (Laughs)
I passed a couple of masters on the way here.
Don't worry about them. They won't come in here. They can't afford to.
Listen, then, do you like smoked salmon?
I love it.
I-I love...
.. I-I love food and drink and...
Shall we get terribly, terribly drunk?
If you like! (Laughs)
The only thing is, though, sometimes when I get drunk, I...
..I say things I shouldn't.
Still, we ought to have something to celebrate with, oughtn't we?
WALTER: Your sherry, sir.
Are you ready to order?
Ah, not yet. Bring me the wine list, would you?
Here we are, sir.
We've a nice little hock, if you care for hock, sir.
No, no, no -- champagne.
I've been drinking it all day and it doesn't do to mix one's drinks.
What's the best champagne you've got?
The Moet, I suppose, sir.
It's been a most unfortunate affair, of course,
but on the whole, the school has not come out of it too badly.
For that, we must be extremely grateful to Barclay and Henderson
for the admirable way they've handled their respective Houses
through what could have been a most serious crisis.
ALL: Hear, hear.
We all know how quickly scandal can spread.
Actually, my father won't have anyone in the firm from Harrow
because of what he's heard.
Well, I can't imagine him wanting anyone from Harrow, anyway.
But we do still have to make it absolutely clear
to the outside world
this was a completely isolated incident.
I cannot emphasise too strongly --
nothing even remotely like it can ever be allowed to occur again.
Alright?
My real father died when I was 14.
How awful.
It was the Easter hols.
I was reading one night in my bed,
when I heard the most peculiar noise --
a sort of... a sort of muffled squeaking.
Couldn't think what it was, at first.
Sounded...trapped or something.
So I... I went down the passage
and it seemed to be coming from my parents' room
and there was a light under the door so...
.. I assumed...
None of my business. Gosh.
Then I... I distinctly heard my mother say, "Help."
(Whispers) Help.
It was terribly eerie.
Complete silence and there it was again. "Help."
I... I didn't know what to do.
No.
I went down the passage and I knocked loudly on the door
and I said, "Are you alright?"
And she said, "Guy, quick, help."
She sounded absolutely at her last gasp.
So I went in.
Listen, are you sure you really want to hear this?
No. No, not if you don't want to tell me.
No, I do.
My...
..my father had... had a heart attack.
Right in the middle of... No!
Happens all the time, apparently.
Well, what better way to go for the man, but for my mother...
Well... she was trapped.
How absolutely incredible!
It was awful.
My mother kept her eyes closed the whole time.
Only wish I could've done so.
It was so embarrassing.
It must have been.
She never really looked me in the eye again.
See... I always hated him.
He was... he was vile.
My mother...
Always been very fond of my mother.
But, well...
..things haven't been quite the same between us since...
..since then.
Perhaps that's why she married again.
Perhaps it is.
Never thought about that.
You know what I'd like to do sometime?
Ride around Europe on a bicycle.
With a tent.
Sharing it with someone you really like.
Mmm.
I've never spent the night with anyone.
Have you? No.
Must be wonderful.
Have you ever been in love?
No. Have you?
No.
Must get in.
(Whispers) Goodnight. Goodnight.
BOY: Fetch!
Come here. Come here!
Susie!
Come here!
Sit!
(Grunts)
(Grunts again)
Alright, Bennett, I've got you this time.
Oh! God, I thought you were Fowler.
Ah! Oh! Ah!
Hmm!
That drainpipe's a bloody disgrace.
I must have a word with the Housemaster.
Pshh!
Tommy...
May I call you Tommy, Tommy?
If you want.
Oh! I'm in love.
That's not exactly news.
Well, I... I don't mean in love. I mean...
I mean in love.
You're drunk.
You know, till now, it's just been a game but...
..now!
What are you doing here?
I thought you didn't have to be back till tomorrow.
And why are you dressed like a God? Um, practice for next term.
You'd better be careful not to get any more food on that waistcoat.
It's grubby already. Damn the waistcoat!
I've been waiting for this since my...
Nothing's ever going to be as good again till I'm ambassador in Paris.
Don't be so pathetic. Life is ladders, Tommy, that's all.
Prep school to here.
1st Form to 6th.
Second assistant junior undersecretary to ambassador in Paris.
Sir Guy Bennett, KCVO, KCMG.
Contemptible sycophant in the service of the bourgeoisie.
What?
It's what Lenin called the renegade Karl Kautsky.
Did he indeed?
Because he substituted eclecticism and sophistry for dialectics.
Oh, well, that is bad.
Grovelling about the kings and queens, walking backwards!
Kissing hands.
You're utterly imbued with the spirit of servility,
that's what he'd have said.
You mean he wouldn't have liked me?
No.
What about James? Who's James?
Harcourt. His name's James.
Quite frankly, I don't think he'd have cared much for the pair of you.
God! First, they take away my torches.
Then when I take my life -- or at least my bum -- in my hands
and creep here to do some work, they send you.
This place is impossible.
'Night. Goodnight.
(Sings) .. Who stole my heart away.....
Huh!
.. Who makes me dream all day
.. Dreams I know will never come true
.. Seems as though I'll ever be blue.....
( GENERAL HUBBUB )
All up!
Who's last?
Wharton.
Find Menzies and ask him to come to me in the garden, right away.
Yes, Barclay. Go on!
BOY: Howzat! ( SCATTERED APPLAUSE )
Jim, good. What is it?
I'm sorry, I've just discovered something awful.
Mr Farquharson's thinking of asking Fowler to stay on.
To be Head of House instead of you. What?
You see, the House isn't going to have enough prefects next term.
Why not? What do you mean?
It'll only be you and Bennett. Two's not enough.
What about Devenish? He's leaving.
His parents take a very dim view of the Martineau business.
They want him to go to agricultural college straightaway.
And as Fowler's a year senior to you and as Judd refuses to be a prefect...
Judd!
Unless you can get him to take a more responsible attitude,
you're a man short, Jim.
Fat chance!
I'm terribly sorry.
He's your only hope.
The answer is no.
I wish you'd reconsider.
I wish you'd let me work.
Look, I wouldn't ask you to do anything you didn't want to do.
You just have to go through the motions, that's all.
Prep duty, dorm, roll-call. Nothing, really.
Menzies, do you have the makings of a politician?
I'm only speaking as one friend to another.
You have! Well, well.
You don't want Fowler to be Head of House any more than I do.
He'll make your life a complete misery.
Too bad.
But I still refuse to collaborate with a system of oppression.
Oh, for God's sake!
GUY: Oh, my God!
I can't look.
Are you alright, Bennett?
Shall I get Matron?
No. It was his smile. It made me dizzy.
Everything beautiful is slightly lopsided.
There's a hollow at the base of his throat
that makes me want to pour honey over him and lick...
Bennett! Hmm?
Wharton, washing up was supposed to be finished 10 minutes ago.
Bennett, come with me.
Have you completely lost your mind?!
Yes, actually.
After all that's happened, you talk like that in front of a junior?!
He doesn't understand. Of course he does!
You'd better take a pull on yourself, Guy.
I'd rather do it with you.
For God's sake, will you stop?!
You've got to start showing a little responsibility.
What on earth are you talking about?!
You don't know what's going on.
Devenish may be leaving. Well?
Fowler may be going to stay on as Head of House.
It can't be true...
Unfortunately, it can.
I need your help, Guy.
It's all Judd's fault for refusing to be a prefect.
I want you to talk to him. You're much more his friend than I am.
Shouldn't think there's a hope in hell.
Well, there must be.
Remember, if Fowler becomes Head of House,
he certainly won't put you up for the Gods.
I'm relying on you, Guy.
Prove your worth for once.
Alright, Devenish, let's have a look.
Not bad.
Not bad at all.
Bennett. Where?
Don't be silly. Let me see your uniform.
Well, it won't do.
It won't do at all.
What's wrong with it?
Do you call those creases?
Well, I'm not very handy with the iron, actually.
Do them again. Do everything again.
I'm not having you let down the whole House.
Won't be the WHOLE House, Fowler, I mean...
..the juniors aren't in the corps.
Nor is Judd.
Don't mention Judd to me.
Judd?
Judd...
Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd...
The moon shines bright.
On such a night as this...
..when the sweet wind did gently kiss the trees
and they did make no noise...
..on such a night, Bennett, methinks, mounted the Gascoigne walls
and sighed his soul toward the Longford tents...
..where Harcourt lay that night.
I can't do it.
I just cannot be a prefect.
Why not?
I do have my reputation, you know.
Your what?!
I'm a school joke, I quite realise that.
But I am, don't you think, a respected joke?
I do at least stick to my principles. People appreciate that.
If I abandoned them now...
No. Sorry.
But you don't care what people think.
About me personally, no.
But they'll say it was all a fake.
No.
Say, "That's what we said all along. It's all a form of showing off."
On the contrary, they'll see the means justifying the ends.
What could be more communist than that?
They'll think it was all a fake.
They'll think all communists are fake.
That's what they say about Stalin.
What's Stalin got to do with it?
That man is sweating blood night and day
to drag his country into the 20th century
and create a whole new concept of society at the same time.
I can't stand it when people sneer at him.
Jokes about the Tzar... Quick! Quick!
Thought I might find you here.
It's alright. I couldn't sleep either.
That bloody dog of Wharton's gets on my nerves.
I should like to go walkies myself. Want to come?
I'm not exactly dressed for walking, actually.
I was working.
Well... I won't disturb you. Would you like my torch?
It lS yours.
Thanks.
This drainpipe's still alright, isn't it?
Afraid I can't tell you.
Barclay... Yes?
Is the Housemaster really going to ask Fowler to stay on?
Things do get about, don't they?
Is he? I don't know.
To tell you the truth, I don't actually care anymore.
I've had enough.
I haven't slept for nights and nights.
Really?
Frankly, I've got to the pitch where I wonder why we bother.
Who? Any of us.
Why we keep the whole thing going.
Sometimes I think none of us really believes in it.
Of course you don't believe in it.
You're afraid to think of anything better.
Do you think so?
You know perfectly well it's all nonsense.
You know it's positively wrong, but you daren't act on your knowledge.
You daren't accept the logical consequences.
Is that it?
You're afraid for your status, your money, your class.
Everything that makes your life safe and comfortable and privileged.
You're afraid to live like an ordinary human being.
Perhaps I am.
Yes.
Leave the window open for me, won't you?
My God...
..that man's really cracking up.
Liberals always do under pressure.
You know... you're a really hard man, Tommy.
I've no time for him.
He just wants a nice easy life with a nice easy conscience
and he's got no right to either.
I'm going to bed.
Are you going to join the fight against Fowler?
I hate him so much, it's difficult to be objective.
Well, the objective fact in this case
is that Fowler is absolutely objectionable.
Please, Tommy.
If you appeal to me as your friend, I'll never forgive you.
Menzies tried that.
I didn't mind it from him. He isn't a friend.
I'll think about it, but...
Oh, God, and I'll be in a rage all day tomorrow.
Ah. Jacker Pot.
Militarism from 12:00 to 4:30.
Little boys all dressed up and playing soldiers. God!
Tommy...
..if I lose his Jacker Pot...
..would you agree to become a prefect then?
If you lose his Jacker Pot,
you probably won't be a prefect yourself.
Goodnight. Goodnight.
Guy?
Careful! Barclay's about.
I know. He nearly saw me.
Thought I'd have a heart attack.
Alright, thank you, Wharton. Now my sash.
Good.
Good luck, Fowler.
Thank you, Wharton.
Fall in!
Battalion -- atten...tion!
Battalion ready for inspection, sir.
Thank you, Sergeant-Major.
How's your father?
Very well, thank you, sir. Good. Good.
BARCLAY: Why did you do it, Bennett?
Do what? You lost us the Pot!
Surely not just me, all on my own?
You were far and away the worst-dressed soldier on the parade.
I'm not a soldier, I'm a schoolboy and so are you.
You're a disgrace to the House and to the entire school.
I'm hopeless with Brasso.
I only get a good shine on my nails. Look!
Let me see your belt.
You want me to undress in front of all these people?
Give it to me!
I reckon that's worth a full six strokes.
Alright, Fowler. You can go ahead.
Thank you.
Come on, Bennett. I appeal to Barclay and Delahay.
Of course.
It's my right. They're our House Gods.
It won't do you any good.
It's still my right.
Alright. If you insist.
If you let him off... We won't.
Bennett's appealed to House Gods.
Gosh.
I wonder what they'll do to him.
Give him a jolly good beating, I should think.
Well, um...
..I just thought you ought to know...
..that if one stroke of Fowler's cane lands on my arse,
I shall go straight to Mr Farquharson, and, ah...
..give him the names of all the people I've...
..done it with over the past three years, that's all.
Bennett, you can't do this.
Oh, I shall begin at the top.
Well...can I, um...go now?
Bloody little tart!
You never thought it particularly bloody at the time.
My God, I'll thrash you myself!
It's only a game, Delahay. There's no need to get so excited.
I thought sportsmen were supposed to be good losers.
I'd never have dared do that.
It's only cheating.
Everyone cheats here the whole time.
I don't.
I bet you do.
When you've got the chance.
I don't even crib!
I don't mean work, I mean games.
Sportsmanship.
It's all hypocrisy.
Well...we all know what goes on in the scrum when the ref's not looking.
Oh, well...
..if THAT'S what you mean.
Mmm.
Yes, of course.
It'll be getting light soon.
Mmm.
I must be going.
( CHOIR SINGS PARRY'S ANTHEM 'I WAS GLAD' )
(Choir continues singing hymn)
( ORGAN MUSIC SWELLS )
Come on.
You know...
..what I really hate about cricket...
..is it's such a damn good game.
(Laughs) Ah, Judd's Paradox.
Of course...
..cricket is a fundamental part of the capitalist conspiracy, hmm?
Of course.
One only has to observe the team.
There's the proletariat forced to labour in the field
while the bourgeoisie indulges in the pleasures of batting and bowling.
Quite.
I mean, there's every reason to suppose...
..that the game ultimately derives
from the wholly unjustified right of the medieval lord
to the unpaid labour of villeins and serfs at haymaking and harvest.
You're really beginning to get the idea.
Thanks.
Ah, there he is at the school shop.
(Sighs) Isn't he awesome, Tommy?
Drawing attention to yourself again?
He's not even waving back.
Course he's not.
You should learn from his discretion.
Oh, if only I could.
I can't get you to change your mind? It's my father.
When he asked what I'd be staying for, it was hard to say.
The First XI next term?
It's a long time to wait on the off-chance.
If I was going to be a God, but... as it is,
just being an ordinary prefect doesn't really make it worthwhile.
Sorry.
By the way...
.. I've decided that greatest happiness of the greatest number
will best be achieved if I do agree to be a prefect.
Tommy!
Stop it.
I'll insist on the terms set forth by Menzies
with one extra condition -- I refuse to take House prayers.
Oh, he won't care about that. Oh, Tommy, my cup runneth over.
You really are a hero of the people.
I'm going to award you the Order of Lenin, first class with oak leaves.
If I wasn't in love with James, I'd be in love with you.
Don't be so emotional. It's a purely rational decision.
Go on. Go tell Menzies before you change your mind.
Alright, alright. He's in the music school.
Go on. Hurry! Going, going.
Wharton! Yes, Bennett?
Want to earn yourself another ice-cream?
I wouldn't mind.
If you go to school shop, you'll find a man from Longford -- Harcourt.
Do you know him? By sight.
Good. Give him this.
Here's sixpence.
Why are you so keen on Harcourt?
If you don't know, I'm certainly not going to tell you.
Now get along.
Oh!
I'll have that, if you don't mind, Wharton.
Now, come on! Give it to me!
Alright, Wharton. Thank you.
Thank you very much.
( VIOLIN PLAYS )
Menzies, can I have a word?
Yes, of course. What is it?
I am willing to become a prefect... (Shouts) Menzies!
..but there are some conditions... Menzies!
Look at this.
What is it?
I've got him this time.
He can't get away now.
I'm taking this straight to Barclay.
What on earth's that all about?
Just one moment, Judd.
We can discuss this later. 932
Devenish, do you think it would make any difference to your attitude,
or your father's attitude,
if you told him you would be in the Gods next term, instead of Bennett?
I'm sure it would.
Perhaps you should go and telephone him.
You mean there's a real chance?
( SOLEMN MUSIC )
(Barclay calls) Wharton!
( KNOCK AT DOOR )
Tell Bennett to come to Hall Table.
I can't do it.
What's the matter? Lost your nerve?
Alright, I'll do it. Come on.
Alright, Bennett. Bend over.
( CRACK! )
(Sobs)
I don't understand.
Why didn't you just use the blackmail again?
Because.
Because what?
Because if I'd gone to Housemaster...
..it'd all come out about James.
So what?
We'd have both been expelled.
Lucky you.
I couldn't do that.
I love him. Oh, come on, Guy.
Look, I'm not going to pretend anymore.
I'm sick of pretending!
You think it's a joke. Well, it's not.
I am never going to love women!
Don't be ridiculous!
Martineau knew that about himself when he was 10. He told me.
You can't possibly know that at 10 or now.
Yes, you can.
Look, it doesn't... come as any great revelation.
It's... more like admitting to yourself something you've always known.
Owning up to yourself. It's...
It's a great relief... in some ways.
You can't trust intuitions like that.
Well, what else is there?
Are you a communist because you read Karl Marx? No.
You read Karl Marx because you are a communist.
I'm very sorry for you.
Thanks! If that's how friends react...
I'm sorry.
You're quite right. That was patronising and unforgivable.
But you couldn't help it, could you?
Because in your heart of hearts,
like Barclay and Delahay and Fowler and Menzies,
you still believe...
..in spite of your talk of equality and fraternity,
you still believe...
..some people are better than others because of the way they make love.
Well... (Sniffs loudly)
..think of that for a lifetime.
Think of the names.
Pansy. Nancy. Fairy. Fruit. Brown-nose.
Look...
This hurts like hell. I'm...
I'm... I'm going to walk it off.
Coming?
Good, that's settled then, Donald. Thanks.
I mean, well, thanks.
Bennett can't complain. I've warned him time and again.
Oh, good. Here they are. Wonderful news.
Devenish is staying on after all.
It's most generous of you to offer, Judd,
but you can keep your principles untarnished now.
But I've a disappointment for you, Bennett,
though it can hardly come as a surprise after recent events.
I shall be nominating Devenish for the Gods next term instead of you.
You bastard.
You really gave me no choice, Guy.
Don't you ever call me by my Christian name again.
Ever.
You were easily bought.
My father was a God himself and when I told him...
Yes, your son will be a God, and your son's son, unto the end of school.
Look, we saved the House from Fowler.
We saved your conscience.
Oh, yes. All problems solved for life. No commies and no queers.
Don't let's quarrel.
We've all got to live together next term.
Let's try and do it as amicably as possible, shall we?
( CHURCH BELLS RING )
It isn't the end of the world.
Isn't it?
When people like Menzies rule the world...
..and you want to be ambassador in Paris... (Humphs)
"Ah, Bennett, yes.
"Nice enough chap.
"Quite amusing, actually.
"We had high hopes of him once but...oh, yes, you heard.
"Not... not quite one of us.
"Bogota, do you think? No. Haiti -- isn't that coming up?
"That's much more his line. You see, he was never a God.
"Only ever an ordinary prefect."
No need to be even that.
Oh, yes, there is.
If I'm spending the rest of my life...
..hiding my true nature...
..I'm taking every comfort that's going when it lS going.
Oh, well, if that's your attitude.
And, besides, being absolutely...
..objective...
..it would dish me once and for all.
You can't have things both ways.
Why not?
OW!
(Whispers) Why not?
Pretend to do one thing, only really do the other.
Fool the swine. Play along with them. Let them think what they like.
Let them despise you, but all along...
Oh, don't talk drivel.
..and have the last laugh and be revenged.
That's just sentimental twaddle.
You wouldn't be in this mess if you had any discretion at all.
What better cover for someone like me than...
..total indiscretion?
( WISTFUL MUSIC )
Wouldn't it be wonderful if communism were really true?
It is true.
What? Heaven on earth?
Earth on earth.
The JUST earth.
GUY: Of course, Tommy was killed in the Spanish Civil War.
Tough as old boots, Tommy was.
Till the bloody fascists got him.
Have you ever wanted to go back?
No.
Is there nobody that you'd want to see?
No.
Isn't there anything you miss at all?
( CHOIR SINGS )
I...
.. I miss the cricket.
SONG:.. Most dear to them that love her
.. Most great to them that know
.. We may not count her armies
.. We may not see her king
.. Her fortress is a faithful heart
.. Her pride is suffering
.. And soul by soul and silently
.. Her shining bounds increase
.. And her ways are ways of gentleness
.. And all her paths are peace...